In a world that often tells us to put others first, it’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that our own needs, desires, and well-being are less important. The belief that we are not enough or somehow less deserving can creep in subtly over time, especially when we prioritize others’ journeys at the expense of our own.
We sacrifice our sense of joy, safety, and even identity, thinking that by giving more, we are showing love, support, and strength. But in doing so, we often forget one crucial truth: we are important too. Our needs are valid, and our joy, well-being, and peace are just as essential as those we are trying to uplift.
For many of us, the idea of love is tied to selflessness, a willingness to give of ourselves in the service of others. It’s a noble idea, but when taken to the extreme, it can be harmful. We start sacrificing our needs to make space for others—whether it's in relationships, friendships, or even work—and over time, we lose touch with ourselves. We may not even realize we’re doing it until one day we wake up feeling empty, drained, or even resentful.
It’s easy to get caught up in wanting to be there for others. We want to be helpful, supportive, and present for the people we care about. And while those are wonderful traits, the problem arises when we do so at the expense of our own happiness and security. If we consistently prioritize others’ journeys, forgetting that we have our own path to walk, we end up neglecting the most important relationship we have—the one with ourselves.
The notion that we are not enough often stems from childhood, societal expectations, or past experiences that have ingrained this belief into our minds. We’ve been conditioned to think that we must achieve more, give more, or be more to be worthy of love and respect. But the truth is, you are enough, just as you are. You don’t have to sacrifice your sense of self to fit into someone else’s narrative.
Loving and supporting others doesn’t mean you should diminish yourself in the process. It’s not selfish to prioritize your well-being; it’s essential. You can be there for others while also being there for yourself. In fact, when you take care of your needs and nurture your inner world, you’re in a better position to offer genuine love and support to those around you.
Here are some keyways to begin unlearning the idea that you’re less deserving and to reclaim your sense of self-worth:
Set Boundaries: Start recognizing when you’re sacrificing too much for others. Set healthy boundaries that allow you to show up for people without draining yourself. Remember, saying no doesn’t make you any less caring; it ensures you don’t lose yourself in the process.
Practice Self-Care: Prioritize your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Whether it’s through mindfulness, exercise, journaling, or spending time doing things that bring you joy, make self-care a daily practice. Taking care of yourself allows you to show up more fully for others.
Affirm Your Worth: Remind yourself daily that you are deserving of love, happiness, and peace. Use affirmations like, "I am enough," or "My needs are important," to reprogram the belief systems that tell you otherwise. The more you affirm your value, the more it will become an undeniable truth in your life.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People: Be intentional about who you allow into your life. Surround yourself with people who uplift you, value your boundaries, and reciprocate the love and care you give them. When you're surrounded by people who respect your worth, you’ll feel less inclined to sacrifice yourself.
Prioritize Your Journey: Understand that your path is just as important as anyone else’s. You’re not just here to support others; you have your own dreams, passions, and goals. Prioritize them. The more you invest in yourself, the more fulfilled you’ll feel.
Let Go of Guilt: If you’ve been sacrificing yourself for so long, it can feel uncomfortable to start prioritizing your own needs. But you must let go of any guilt associated with putting yourself first. Self-love isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. You can love others fully while also loving yourself.
Celebrate Your Progress: Often, we forget to recognize how far we’ve come. Take time to celebrate your growth, accomplishments, and the steps you’ve taken toward self-care and self-worth. By doing this, you reinforce the idea that you are enough and deserve all the good that comes your way.
It’s time to unlearn the belief that you are less important or deserving. You deserve to feel safe, joyful, and secure in your own life, without having to make sacrifices that diminish your sense of self. It’s okay to be present for others, but not at the expense of your own well-being. You can love fully while still setting boundaries that protect your peace.
As you continue your journey of self-growth, remind yourself every day that you matter. Your needs matter. And the more you honor yourself, the more you’ll realize that you were never “less” to begin with.
Have you struggled with sacrificing your needs for others? How did you learn to prioritize yourself while still loving those around you?
See you in the next post!
Yours Truly,
Serina
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